India Removing Women’s Eyes Who Are Caught Reading Books

Punjab, INDIA — Located on the edge of India in the northwest corner of the region, the state of Punjab is taking drastic measures to prevent women from reading books, they are permanently removing their eyes.
23-year-old Harikrishna Majumdar who heads up the newly created Punjab Anti-Reading Task Force (PARTF) explained to reporters the importance of what they

Teacher Fired After Telling 1st Graders That Santa, Easter Bunny And Tooth Fairy Do Not Exist

DeQuincy, Louisiana — Parents have brought a class action lawsuit against the DeQuincy Elementary School in Louisiana over comments made by a first grade teacher back on December 12th. According to first graders, 45-year-old Paul Horner told his class that Santa Claus, the Easter Bunny and the Tooth Fairy do not exist.
Principal Courtney Groves explained to reporters what happened that fateful day. “Besides Santa Claus, the Easter Bunny and the Tooth Fairy not existing, Horner also told the class that their parents lie to them because they don’t love them. Horner told the students that their whole life is a lie and

Woman Kills Five People For Not Accepting Her Friend Requests On Facebook

DeQuincy, LA — Lashawndra Harris from DeQuincy, Louisiana was arrested and charged in connection with five murders today. Harris had been dubbed by police as the ‘Facebook Friend Request Killer’ because at the scene of every murder a card was left on the victim’s body that showed the Facebook logo along with the section of the site where you can accept or deny an individual’s friend request.
Detective Paul Horner with the DeQuincy

Chinese husband sues wife for being ugly, wins $120,000

Northern Chinese resident Jian Feng divorced and sued his wife for $120,000 and won! The story goes that Mr. Feng was deeply in love with his beautiful wife until they had a baby girl.

Feng was horrified at how ugly the baby was and demanded to know who his wife had cheated on him